Mission: Hogwarts
by bmystee
Summary: Roy and his command are forced into helping the Ministry of Magic. But when they find out the truth, whose side will they be on? HP5/FMA2003
1. An Inconvenient Assignment

**A/N: Here's the first chapter of the new and improved Mission: Hogwarts! Hope you enjoy this new plot line!**

**As a general note, when I say 'Mustang's men' that may or may not include Hawkeye. I find it just plain awkward to say 'Mustang's men and woman' and I'm pretty sure Hawkeye's addressed like a man in the military most of the time anyway.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist or Harry Potter.**

* * *

**Chapter 1: An Inconvenient Assignment**

'_That damn Hakuro...forcing such a huge operation on my team! How the hell am I supposed to get promoted in a place like England?! Obviously he's trying to keep me from taking his place as Führer,' _General Roy Mustang fumed as he stalked down the hallway towards his office. In his right hand, he clutched a file thick enough to hold the world's secrets, while his left hand was balled into a tense fist.

"S-Sir!" A young private hurriedly saluted Mustang as he sighted the decorated General. It was apparent that Mustang's fiery demeanor left the poor lad a pool of nerves.

"Hm," was his only acknowledgement as Roy continued his silent ranting.

'_After all my diligent work in Central (with Hawkeye's help of course), he sends me off to a country further than Drachma! Oh, his excuse is good, 'making new allies' indeed! You don't need a General for that! He could send any number of Colonels on such a vague mission! But no, it had to be me!' _Mustang turned a corner and entered his outer office and addressed his command. "Listen up! Be in my office for a briefing in half an hour! It's direct orders from Führer Hakuro himself! And get Fullmetal in here too!"

Havoc and Breda stood up simultaneously from their seats around the chess board and Fuery and Falman looked up from a broken radio system.

"Yes, sir," Hawkeye, the only female in the room, saluted firmly after setting down a stack of paperwork. "I will call Edward immediately."

* * *

The room was silent as the five soldiers lined up facing their superior's desk. Mustang glared at the door behind them.

"Where the hell is Fullm-"

"I'M HERE!" There was a loud crash as Mustang's office door slammed against the wall. Ed had his gloved hands on his knees, panting like he'd just run a marathon.

"Well, looks like you're actually on time for once. But this is still cutting it close. Not to mention, that entrance is completely unacceptable." Mustang gave a frustrated sigh.

"Bastard. Just cut me some slack, alright? I ran from the other side of town!" Edward straightened up and crossed his arms with a stubborn huff. "And don't call a meeting on such short notice!"

A slow smirk spread across Mustang's face. "Such _short_ notice? But I thought that'd be perfect for you."

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING-!" Ed exploded.

"But that's beside the point. Since everyone's here, let's start this briefing." Mustang nonchalantly waved Ed's outburst aside.

Ed's jaw dropped. "D-DON'T IGNORE ME!"

But Edward stomped over to his position beside Hawkeye anyway. As soon as he got in line, all six subordinates gave Mustang a quick salute (though Ed's was a little more hesitant).

"Sir! Reporting as requested, sir!" they chanted.

"Alright, as you all know, I've just come back from a meeting with the Führer. He has requested that I be transferred temporarily to England." Sounds of surprise left Mustang's men. "Hakuro has been kind enough to let me bring my command along, but there's more to this. Though the details seem vague, England appears to be in some state of instability right now. Our country is already at war with Drachma and has seen many conflicts with other neighboring countries. The Führer believes it best that we start making some allies, starting with the wizarding population of England. This is a strategic move not only for the future, but also the present. By allying with England, we can surround Drachma and hopefully end our war up north. If not by fear, then by force.

"Also, the outcome of England will directly affect our country. If we leave England alone, the Drachmans will take it over and we would have to deal with even more enemies. But if we can help stabilize England, it will become a powerful comrade. Again," and here Roy glared down at the thick file beside his elbow, "despite the amount of background information I've gathered, the details are still vague and there's no mention of what we're stabilizing. Hopefully, we can get some more information from the Minister of Magic. He has accepted our offer to help, and has given us a place in his ministry to set up base. Further instructions of our mission will be given to us after we arrive. Any questions?"

"So, how long is this 'temporary' transfer?" Ed glared at Mustang even knowing that he was not to blame.

"Well, it depends. Our mission is to...let's see...'Aid England in regaining stability.'" Mustang eyed the file with discontent. "Once we achieve that, we can come back."

"What the-? That's ridiculous! We can't guarantee stability to a whole country! That's impossible!" Havoc exclaimed with his arms outstretched. Breda nodded in agreement.

Mustang sighed. "I agree. But if we can just sum up in a report how our actions ended a revolt or whatever the hell is going on other there, we could probably plead ignorance and head home. Even the Führer can't blame us for that."

"...Sir. How are we even getting to England? It's to the west of Drachma. With all the activity up there, it's impossible to travel through that huge country without being attacked." Hawkeye touched a finger to her chin in thought.

"You've all heard the rumors of Britain's 'magic,' haven't you? I've been informed that some of their Aurors are picking us up tomorrow at noon. I suggest packing your bags tonight and saying goodbye to your families. You may not see them for a while. Report back here tomorrow morning at 1100 hours. Dismissed." Mustang raised his gloved left hand and waved them away. However, as all six soldiers began to leave, Mustang said, "Oh! Fullmetal, if you would stay behind. There's a second part to this mission that pertains only to you."

Ed stared back in surprise. "Me? What could there possibly be in all this political crap for me?"

Mustang chuckled. "Thought you might say that. Still, it's not that hard to comprehend. Even if we want England as an ally, we can't guarantee they won't end up as our enemy someday. The Führer - and I as well - would like you to do some digging on their magical abilities. Even though it's completely separate from alchemy, you're smart enough to figure it out. Learn their strengths, and figure out a way to counter it. We're expecting a report from you at the end of all this."

Ed looked at Mustang with mild disgust. "Figures. The military's backstabbing its allies already. There are just no morals in this place, are there?"

"For all your insults, you're still here. After getting your brother's body back, I thought for sure you'd hand in your resignation letter." Mustang raised an eyebrow in silent question.

Ed blushed and said hurriedly, "I've just gotten used to it here, alright?! It's not like there's many jobs for me out there anyways. I dropped out of elementary school, remember?"

"I can hardly believe that. Hasn't Alphonse been attending Dolor University? He dropped out at the same time as you, yet he's getting a medical degree at the number one university in Amestris." Mustang nearly snorted.

"Well, Al's always been amazing like that. Besides, I can't really imagine myself in a school, studying for the next midterm, you know? I've just gotten used to this life. Is it so hard to believe?" Ed looked down irritably and muttered, "And I guess it's not that bad here...I mean, Hawkeye, Havoc, Breda...I consider all of them my friends. Even you...Maybe." At the last word, Ed looked up with a half-hearted glare.

Mustang looked at Ed in surprise, then his face fell back into a smile. "Well, as long as you're willing to stay, you're always welcome. It'd be so boring without you around to tease." Ed frowned at that. "So! Do some research on their English magic, alright?"

"Fine, fine." Ed grumbled.

"Good. You're dismissed, Fullmetal."

* * *

"So...you don't know when you'll be back?" Al worried about Ed all the time, but this mission seemed more suspicious than usual. Ed didn't seem to think much of it, but Al was having other thoughts.

Ed nodded and said, "I'll try to finish it as quickly as possible, but I can't guarantee anything. The whole mission's kinda still in the fog."

"Ed, that doesn't sound too good...You're going to another country...One that's more than just a border away! Doesn't it sound weird that they couldn't even tell you what the mission was?"

"Come on, Al. Don't be such a worry-wort! I'll be fine, I'm eighteen years old!" Ed exclaimed.

"'You'll be fine?' You can't even cook your own meals!" Al raised his eyebrows in disbelief.

"Hey! I can too! I just..._choose_ not to!" Ed pouted angrily at his brother.

"Sure, just like how you _choose_ not to grow any taller?" Al laughed as started stacking the dishes from dinner.

"W-Wha-?! Al, you-! YOU'RE EVIL! How could you even _imply_ such a thing!"

"I'm not implying anything, brother, I'm making a point." Al sighed. "Who's going to take care of you if I'm not there?"

"Show a little respect for your older brother. I can take care of myself," Ed pouted as he got up to take the dishes.

"I know you can, but I worry anyway. You're my brother after all. And you could be gone a while...I'll miss you."

"Oh come off it, Al. You're going off to Dolor in a week, so we'd be apart anyway. I sure you wouldn't even notice!" Ed said as he entered the kitchen.

"...Are you excited?" Al asked, wrapping the leftovers in plastic wrap. "I mean, you're going to experience _magic_! It must be so wondrous..."

"Yeah, I guess. There's all those rumors about how law-defying their powers are...but I'm not gonna believe it till I see it! Scientific observation and all that, you know?" Ed smirked in a way that only he could as he turned on the tap. Reaching for the dishwashing soap, Ed began to monotonously scrub at the plates.

"Do you need help packing? I could get started on that for you," Al offered as he climbed the stairs.

"Thanks Al, but I think I can handle it myself. You just enjoy your summer break," Ed called back.

Ed looked out the window by the sink. He could see the sunset casting beautiful patterns of gold, pink, and orange over the buildings and landmarks of Central. He always loved this view. It was a rare and peaceful moment that seemed almost out of place in such a busy city. It could make him forget all the chaos he knew existed in Central.

'_Well, that's enough of that. I probably won't see this view for quite a while.'_ Ed sighed as he put away the clean dishes and headed upstairs to pack.

* * *

Ed entered the office with his trademark suitcase and red coat, finding that almost everyone was there and ready to go.

"Hey boss! We haven't been on a mission together in a while, have we?" Breda saluted lazily as Ed walked towards him.

"Yeah, you tend to do solo mission nowadays, don't cha?" Havoc turned from his ashtray to face the young blonde. "You know, I can almost think of this as a vacation. We're going off to explore a foreign country! (They probably got a ton of hot babes there!)"

"Pfft. I wouldn't call it a vacation. That country's gonna get cold, and I don't do well in the cold." Ed frowned. He hadn't had time to switch out his automail for a more suitable model. '_If we have to make it through the winter, I'm gonna be in trouble...'_

Suddenly, the door behind Ed opened with a click. Turning around, he could see that Roy Mustang was coming through the door. However, Ed's attention was focused on the two men behind Mustang. One had short curly hair and bright blue eyes, while the other fashioned a long ponytail down his back. Both were wearing buttoned down trench coats so that only a tie could be seen peeking out from underneath. Mustang closed the wooden door behind him and turned to face his command.

"Men, these are the Aurors I mentioned yesterday. This is Mr. Proudfoot-" Mustang motioned to the middle-aged man with blue eyes, "-and this here is Mr. Williamson. They will be escorting us to the Minister of Magic in England."

All six soldiers snapped their feet together and saluted the General, bowing to the two strangers immediately afterwards.

"At ease," Mustang said as he looked over to his command, but when his eyes landed on Ed's bright red coat, he sighed. "Fullmetal. Go change into your uniform right away. We're leaving to meet a _Minister_ in an hour, and I will not allow you to be dressed so casually. I thought you said you'd take this military thing more seriously now. Obviously, it's not serious enough."

Ed threw an irritated glare at Mustang. "Yes, _sir_. Right away, _sir_." He picked up his suitcase and left for the nearest bathroom.

Mustang's eyes followed Ed out the door before looking back at the Aurors apologetically. "I'm deeply sorry for his misconduct. His higher-ups have been lenient on his attire because of his young age and his alchemic talent. However, at times like these, it does pose a problem."

The Aurors nodded unsurely. "How young is he? I did not see any other soldiers as young as him walking around," Williamson said.

"Ah, yes, he is a special case. Our military doesn't recruit children, but he alone has been in our service for quite a few years." Mustang then directed the Aurors to his couch. "Please, have a seat. England is such a faraway country. You must be tired from your travels."

"Ah, thank you, but no. We used a portkey to get here, and we must set up the next one for our way back." Proudfoot replied, and pulled out his wand.

"I...see. Well, you may go about your business. Ask any of my men if you require assistance. I still have some paperwork to finish before I can leave." Mustang said as he entered his main office.

A few minutes later, Edward returned in a blue uniform decorated with badges and ribbons. His rank of Major was displayed with four golden stripes and a star on each shoulder. He was wearing unworn combat boots that came up to his shins. He was pulling his braid out of the collar when he was greeted by his co-workers.

"That looks good on you, Edward. But you're supposed to put your hair up too," Hawkeye commented.

"Ah, this is already annoying enough. I think the braid's good. I can fight in it, and that's all that counts," Ed said.

"Yeah, Boss wouldn't be Boss without his braid. Besides, him in uniform is already creeping me out. Haha! Never thought I'd see the day!" Havoc slapped Ed hard enough on his back to topple him over. Ed just glared tiredly back at the smoking male.

'_This is gonna be a long mission,'_ Ed thought dejectedly.

* * *

Noon was rolling around, so the Aurors started gathering everyone together.

"Alright, officers, our portkey is just about ready to leave! Stand in a circle around this shirt and make sure not to let go until I say so. If you let go too early, you may suffer some serious injuries," Williamson signaled the soldiers to approach the light green shirt laid out on Breda's desk. Mustang and his command inched towards the shirt as if it would bite into an arm at the first chance.

"So...this shirt is a...potkey?" Fuery asked timidly.

"_Port_key, but yes. You touch it and it will take us to the Ministry of Magic lobby when it disappears. Now hurry! It leaves in ten seconds."

Immediately, all the Amestrians rushed towards the shirt, reaching to grab it. Not long after, everyone felt a tug in their stomach and were suddenly spinning through the air.

"Hold on! Don't let go!" Proudfoot shouted when he saw the alarm in their faces.

Almost just as fast, a solid surface met the feet of these nine portkey users. The Aurors were used to the sensation, so they landed steadily on their feet. The Amerstrians were not as fortunate. Falman fell face first on the ground taking Havoc and Fuery along with him. Breda fell backwards and landed on his bottom, kicking Mustang behind the knees and forcing the General to bash his knees forcefully against the marble floor. Cursing loudly, Mustang looked up just in time to see Ed land on the edge of a large fountain fall into a golden fountain and slip. He chuckled in amusement watching Ed flap his arms around frantically in the fountain trying to get out. When he finally did climb out, he was soaked from head to toe. However, Mustang's amusement died upon seeing Proudfoot and Williamson looking skeptically at his command.

'_This is not the best first impression by far. If we want them as allies, we need to gain their respect.'_ Mustang quickly picked himself up and cleared his throat. "Attention!"

The soldiers hurriedly got to their feet to stand in a line in front of Mustang. Ed, still soaked, ran to his spot next to Hawkeye. Despite their ruffled appearance, all six soldiers remained stalk still staring straight ahead.

"Our mission begins now. Not more scrambling around; I want efficiency and accuracy in everything you do beyond this point. Is that understood?"

"Yes, sir! Understood, sir!"

"Good. Now clean yourselves off and let's get ready to move! We will be following Mr. Proudfoot and Mr. Williamson for the time being."

"Sir, yes sir!"

As soon as he was freed from his stance, Edward clapped his mismatched hands together and touched his hair. With a brilliant blue spark, the fountain water evaporated from his head, leaving perfectly dried hair. At this simple display of alchemy, the Aurors and many bypassing wizards and witches dropped their jaws in astonishment. They had never seen such wandless magic before. However, it would seem that the famous Fullmetal was used to onlookers, because he just continued to dry his uniform (which gave these spectators another glimpse of this phenomenon), and went to pick up his brown suitcase.

"W-What the hell?! How can he do that! I'm _know_ he didn't use a wand!" Proudfoot exclaimed. "T-That's just not possible!"

Mustang smirked. '_Well, I think that's the right impression I was looking for.' _Instead he said, "That was just some simple alchemy. Any beginner alchemist could do such a basic state change. Of course, us State Alchemists can go much more advanced than that little pallor trick."

Ed's brow twitched at the 'little' comment, but he remained silent. Political agendas went way over his head; it was more Mustang's category. (He could always punch Mustang in the face later.)

"But he's just a child! From what we've heard, even simple alchemy is incredibly complex! In fact, before your country contacted us, we thought it was a nearly impossible art!"

"Like I've said before, Edward here is a special case. The military wouldn't keep someone so young otherwise. To our knowledge, he is the only Amestrian alive who can transmute - do alchemy, that is - with just his hands. Most alchemists have to draw alchemic arrays for it to work at all." Mustang explained as he eyed Edward. '_There. I've given you some credit, Fullmetal. So behave yourself for this mission.'_

Edward seemed to get his message, though he gave Mustang an unimpressed grunt and an exaggerated eye roll.

"I-I see..." Williamson said, though it was obvious he did _not_ see.

"My, my! Look at the time! We have to get you all to the Minister's office in five minutes! Let's go!" Proudfoot beckoned the large group towards an extravagant corridor as he checked his pocket watch.

The group quickly followed after Proudfoot towards the elevator at the other end. The Amestrians tried not to look like excited tourists, but it was exceptionally hard. Many of these soldiers lived in small apartments and military dorms, and for those who had suffered through the nightmarish Ishbalan trenches, walking through this _palace_ was almost unimaginable.

By the time the group reached the antique looking elevator, many of them were speechless from the beautiful architecture. Central headquarters could never look like this!

The elevator doors opened, and the nine people squeezed in. After a short ride, the doors opened again to reveal another long corridor. However, instead of an elevator shaft on the other side, there was a pair of large oak doors.

"Alright, then. We're almost there. The Minister's office is just on the other side of those doors," Williamson said as he pointed towards those twin wooden doors.

* * *

Three loud knocks woke Cornelius Fudge from his midday nap.

"C-Come in!" Minister Fudge replied as he quickly glanced at the clock. '_Ah. So it's those Amestrians.'_

The door creaked open and Fudge was suddenly faced with a crowd. Looking to the only two people he recognized, he nodded for them to proceed.

"Minister Fudge! We've brought your Amestrian guests, as per your request. Would you like us to stay or would you prefer to be left in private?" Williamson said as he led the whole group into the Minister's large office.

"...Both of you stay, just in case. Of course a military man like you will take no offense?" Minister Fudge looked to Mustang apprehensively.

"Of course not. I would do the same in your position, Minister," Mustang replied cooly. '_So, this guy's a wimp. Good to know.' _

Fudge breathed a sigh of relieve. "Ah, yes. Right. So, how should we start?"

Ed raised his eyebrows. '_What the hell's wrong with this guy? No wonder England's unstable. Their Minister can't even hold a briefing right!_'

Mustang was having the same thoughts as Ed. This Fudge character shouldn't get intimidated just because they were foreign! This was ridiculous... "How about we start with introductions? Sadly, we don't know much about you. The file you sent us was very vague on many counts. Quite dissatisfactory, really."

Mustang's command caught his strategy immediately. Mustang was egging Fudge on. He wanted to see how far he could push this Minister's nerves and how far he would bend.

"A-Ah! Quite sorry about that...Terribly sorry. I-I'll talk to my secretary immediately! Yes..." Fudge was already sweating.

Mustang's signature smirk made its grand appearance. "Yes...Seeing as you are still failing to introduce yourself, I will go ahead." Mustang watched as Fudge continued to sputter and thought, '_This'll be easier than I thought. Pull a few strings here and there, and we'll be home in a month.'_

Unlike Mustang, Edward couldn't hold a straight face. Luckily, the attention was on Mustang so his amusement went unnoticed. '_Usually I can't stand the manipulative Bastard, but when you're on his side, this can be kinda fun.'_

"Now then, I am General Roy Mustang, also known as the Flame Alchemist. Here is my elite command. These are the men I would trust my life with."Stepping aside and pointing to Edward, he continued, "This is Major Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist."

Edward straightened up and gave a firm salute, fearlessly challenging Fudge's skeptical look.

Mustang also noticed the doubt in Fudge's eyes and decided to elaborate. "I would suggest you not judge a book by its cover, Minister. Edward Elric may be young, but he is without question one of the most talented and powerful alchemists in our country. He is a prodigy in his own right and is well-known not only in Amestris, but also in many neighboring countries, including Drachma and Creta."

Satisfied that he had made his point, Mustang continued down the line. "This is First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye, Second Lieutenant Jean Havoc, Second Lieutenant Heymans Breda, Second Lieutenant Vato Falman, and Sergeant Major Kain Fuery.

"Now then. We have introduced ourselves, and would now like to find out who _you_ are, Minister." Mustang continued to push at Fudge's nerves.

"Y-Yes. I am Minister Cornelius Oswald Fudge, Order of Merlin, First Class. Your Führer offered his services and I've accepted them. I've vacated an office two levels above for you and your people." Fudge spoke quickly, trying to get these people - Mustang especially - out of his office.

"Our mission, Minister?" Mustang interrupted. He held no respect for this Minister, and he wasn't afraid to show it. Mustang could tell Fudge wasn't the real man in charge. He had been the puppeteer enough times to pick out a puppet when he saw one. Fudge was no threat.

"A-Ah, yes. Your mission is this. Investigate Albus Dumbledore."

* * *

**A/N: Yay! First chapter up. I'm hoping this story will go better than my first attempt. Please give your honest opinions on this new story. My writing's a little rusty, but I'm hoping you can still enjoy it! Read and review, people!**


	2. Mutual Investigations

**A/N: I forgot to mention this last time, but my knowledge of Proudfoot and Williamson goes to Wikipedia. The layout for the Ministry of Magic goes to hp-lexicon . org**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything. As in anything. So it'd be a waste of your money to sue me.**

* * *

**Last Chapter:**

"Our mission, Minister?" Mustang interrupted. He held no respect for this Minister, and he wasn't afraid to show it. Mustang could tell Fudge wasn't the real man in charge. He had been the puppeteer enough times to pick out a puppet when he saw one. Fudge was no threat.

"A-Ah, yes. Your mission is this. Investigate Albus Dumbledore."

* * *

**Chapter 2: Mutual Investigations**

"Albus Dumbledore...?" Roy Mustang couldn't help but feel confused. He had read about Dumbledore briefly in the Führer's folder, and had no doubt that the wizard was an influential man. However, what surprised him was that Dumbledore had seemed a _good man_ to him, and Roy Mustang was very good at reading people. Every action Dumbledore had taken, it was for a good cause, and as far as Mustang could tell, there were no ulterior motives of personal gain. If anyone could bring stability and peace to England, it was him. The Ministry should be building Dumbledore a monument, not investigating him behind his back!

"Yes, Albus Dumbledore, that old coot! He's conspiring against me, against this whole wizarding world! I need you to find out what he's up to and stop him!" Fudge slapped both palms down onto the surface of his desk.

"...I see. My men will start working on it right away. I'll need full access to your archives and a layout of this entire building," Mustang listed off.

"W-Well... We can't allow just anyone to leaf through our archives. Every government has its secrets, you know?" Fudge fidgeted under Mustang's attentive gaze.

"No need to get suspicious, Minister. I simply want to perform a thorough background check on this Dumbledore figure. Knowing a man's origins is the best way of predicting his future, after all," Mustang answered smoothly.

"...I suppose. Alright, why don't we compromise then? I'll get the archive division to send over as many documents pertaining to Dumbledore as it can. How does that sound?" Fudge smiled.

"That's fine. Now, I'm sure my men would like to set their things down."

"Yes, of course. Williamson, show them to their office and resting areas. And conjure up a map for them as well. Afterwards, you may return to your Auror duties."

* * *

The office door closed as Williamson finally left the Amestrian soldiers alone.

"So, what did that Minister-" Falman was silenced by three hands covering his mouth and two additional shushes.

"Fullmetal. I want this place soundproof," Mustang commanded.

Edward gave him a look of disbelief. "You do realize I haven't had a chance to actually study this magic thing yet. How the hell am I supposed to counter it without even knowing what it is?"

"You're supposed to be a genius. Improvise."

"...You're unbelievable," Edward sighed, but complied anyway. The crew could almost see the clogs in his brain turning rapidly as he thought, _'Okay, let's see. First, I have to get rid of any magical influence. Let's assume a magic spell can't be transferred from the intended object to an adjacent one simply by contact. Otherwise, all the spells would just blend together and nothing would work. In which case, I can just transmute a slightly smaller, soundproof room within this one. Even if the room I transmuted were to touch things bewitched by some...eavesdropping spell...it shouldn't be affected by the spell._

_'Next problem: where to get non-magic material to make a new room...Well, since we're underground, there should be plenty of soil surrounding us.'_ Edward suddenly barked, "Mustang! Give me that map you requested."

"You know, I'm the CO here, so I should be the one doing the commanding. It's not the other way around," Mustang raised an eyebrow.

"Well it should be. Bastard. Maybe it'll fix that annoying god complex of yours." As soon as Edward got ahold of the map, he opened it and started mumbling to himself. "Alright, we're here, so this far wall should be dividing us from the outside." Edward suddenly got up and started towards the wall across from him. "This is child's play."

Ed gave a wolf-like smirk and slapped his gloved hands together. He then placed it against the wall he was facing and closed his eyes as the bright blue light of alchemy burst forth. He made a narrow tunnel that stretched out into the undisturbed soil outside. He clapped again to do the second transmutation. This time, what looked like brown paint oozed out of the small tunnel in the wall. Within a few seconds, the transmuted soil covered every corner of the room and wrapped around every object it could reach, making the room look like the inside of a chocolate bar. Finally, Ed clapped a third time, and the brown color was replaced by the appropriate colors of an office. The cabinets regained their silver color, the bookshelves became white again, the chairs darkened to match black coil, and even the little decorations throughout the room had returned to their original colors.

"Nicely done, Fullmetal. You even took into account that the furniture could be spelled," Mustang nodded in approval.

"Of course I took it into account; I'm not an amateur," Ed looked offended. "But I'll start researching into these magic spells later today, if possible."

"Good. It never hurts to be too careful. We can't trust anyone here. Fudge made it obvious he was hiding something, so keep a skeptical mind," Mustang said. "Alright, seeing as Fudge isn't going to give us any information, Fuery! Havoc!"

"Yes, sir!" The two soldiers stood at attention.

"I want you to get familiarized with the layout of this building. Locate each department, check every exit. I want a brief summary of all the main departments and a useable escape route by the end of the day."

"Yes, sir!"

"Falman, Fullmetal. Go find the archive division. Both of you are antisocial bookworms, so you can probably bond easier with them. Keep them from filtering _everything_ we get," Falman gave a sharp salute while Edward scowled.

"Finally, Hawkeye, Breda...Help me get this office sorted out." Mustang always hated this part of the transfer process the most. "And all of you should get your lunch breaks while you can. This is gonna be a busy week."

* * *

"Level two...so this is the Department of Magical Law Enforcement," Fuery said as he looked down at his copy of the Ministry map.

"Law Enforcement, huh? Sounds more like home," Havoc chuckled nervously. So far, he and Fuery had toured the Department of Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures on level four and the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes on level three. Both floors had been more disturbing and inconceivable than they could ever anticipate. They saw models of dragons and...horse-men? _Ghosts_ were floating straight through them. And some of the reported injuries didn't even seem possible! A man with ears on his forehead, a girl with an elephant nose?! "That last one was like a messed up chimera factory…" Havoc shuttered.

"Don't even talk about it! I'm gonna have nightmares for the rest of my life!" Fuery looked like he was about to cry.

The elevator doors opened and before the two soldiers could even fully step out of the lift, a blur of red nearly tackled them down.

"These are amazingly accurate Muggle uniforms! Even the fabric looks authentic! Who designed them for you? I _must_ know!" A balding redhead in his 40's was tugging at every fold and ribbon on Fuery's blue uniform.

"A-Ah! Um..." Fuery seemed completely disoriented by the situation. "W-Who are you?!"

"Oh, my. I'm terribly sorry. I just get so excited whenever I see these things. Muggles are so intriguing, aren't they? I'm Arthur Weasley, head of the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office right down the hall." The redhead quickly backed off from Fuery.

"So you occupy this level? I'm Jean Havoc and this is Kain Fuery. We just moved into the Department of International Magical Cooperation a few hours ago. Do you mind giving us a quick tour? Our commanding officer wants us to familiarize ourselves with the new environment."

"Oh certainly! It's been a moderate week so far. I'm sure an extra fifteen minutes on break wouldn't hurt," Arthur smiled kindly. "So where are you lads from?"

"We're Amestrian soldiers. Here to form new relations, you know?" Fuery jumped in.

"Oh, yes, yes. It's always good to make new friends. But Amestris is pretty far. Why, I've only heard rumors about that place," Arthur said as he starting walking down the hall. "This door leads to the office of Magical Equipment Control. They track down black-markets and do annual merchandise checks on major magic stores, that sort of thing.

"So...is it true? That magic users and muggles live in one community in Amestris? I've always been told that was an impossible dream!" Arthur exclaimed.

"Oh, we don't call them magic users, but basically, yeah. Everyone knows about alchemists, but they're just like any other person to us. We don't think of them as a separate species or anything!" Havoc replied.

"That's astounding!" There was a momentary pause before Arthur continued, " ...So I assume you two aren't alchemists? Excuse me, but...don't the muggles ever get..._jealous_?" Arthur asked shyly. That was a major concern for wizards after all.

"I guess that's the difference between magic and alchemy. Anyone can learn alchemy. It's not some inborn ability; it's more like math or science. If you're willing to put in the time and effort, then you can at least do some basic alchemy. But truthfully, not everyone wants to learn it. It's time consuming and very difficult to understand. So unless you're total brainiacs like the alchemists we know, you won't find it all that worthwhile."

"Your country must be so different from ours. We magic folk have to keep a very secretive life because of the muggles. And with them expanding their territories so sporadically, it's getting pretty hard to keep ourselves hidden. Come along this way, I'll show you to my office."

Turning a few corners, the three men entered a much larger room filled with cubicles. Men and women dressed similarly to Williamson and Proudfoot sat within these mini workplaces, reviewing moving photos and filling out paperwork.

"This is the Auror headquarters. Aurors are specially trained wizards and witches who investigate crimes and capture dark magic users," Arthur waved at a few of the Aurors before heading towards the back of the room. "My office is right behind here."

"Don't you think these Aurors sound a bit like our State Alchemists?" Fuery whispered to Havoc.

"State Alchemists? What are those?" Arthur asked.

"Oh! Um...put simply, they're alchemists employed by the state. Almost every State Alchemist has a different area of expertise. They're given missions that range from inspecting coal mines to capturing mass murderers. However, they must be prepared for war at all times. Usually as a last resort, State Alchemists are sent to the battlefield by the Führer to...wipe out the opposition," Fuery said the last bit with a grimace.

"They sound formidable..." Arthur said worriedly as he passed the last row of cubicles.

"But don't worry! Most of them are pretty decent people. We actually have two State Alchemists with us. Would you like to meet them later?" Fuery said hurriedly.

"Oh, I don't know... I don't have _that_ much free time..." Arthur wasn't sure if this was a good idea anymore. Of course, people from different departments mingled all the time, but these Amestrians just seemed so _different_. Muggles could supply his endless curiosity, but the more he learnt about these Amestrians, the more danger he seemed to feel. Maybe he could redirect the conversation. "So, uh...What are you guys doing at the Ministry specifically? I'm assuming you're not just touring England."

"We're here to assist your Ministry in any way possible. To finalize the allegiance, you know?"

"And what are you assisting us with? Are you tied to a specific sector?"

"Oh, no. Our team works independently. We're investigating a suspicious character for your Minister. One Albus Dumbledore."

Arthur froze.

* * *

Edward had convinced Falman to take a quick snack break with him before heading to the archive rooms. A growling stomach was most definitely not the best way to greet future 'friends' after all. After exploring the otherworldly treats and desserts (Ed was deeply disturbed by the Chocolate Frogs and a _milk_ flavored jelly bean), the dual headed for the archives. After a few minutes of searching around, the two soldiers finally found their destination.

"...This...What the hell is this?!" Ed growled.

"Sir, I believe this is a nonstandard oak door with a 2-by-11 inch mail slot. From its outer appearance, I would deduce the manufacturing company be—"

"I know that, dammit! I'm an alchemist after all. I meant, how the hell are we supposed to get in! Where's the stupid door knob?!" Ed started pounding on the door. "Hello! Anybody there?! We're here to get Albus Dumbledore's profile! Hello?!"

"Welcome, Mr. Vato Falman and Mr. Edward Elric from Amestris, to the Ministry—"

"Where'd that come from?!" Ed exclaimed as he scanned the empty hallway.

"—of Magic archive division. Please wait momentarily as I gather the Albus Dumbledore profile for you." The mail slot suddenly popped open and a folded length of parchment paper slowly slid out. "Have a nice day," and the mail slot flap slammed shut.

"Uh...so it was a _talking mail slot_?!" Ed's jaw dropped as he finally located where the voice had come from.

"It would seem the archive is operated by magic; we can't gain access to the original files. We must report this to the General immediately." Falman nodded, and picked up the parchment paper that had fallen to the floor.

Edward glared at the offending mail slot and turned to follow Falman back to their office. Mustang wasn't going to be happy about this.

* * *

"Your office is on the level five, right? The department for international relations," Arthur said as he pressed the elevator button.

"Um... yes. But you really don't have to come with us. You just said you were busy," Fuery said nervously.

"No, no. You're guests! Can't have you getting lost in this humongous building, now can I?" Arthur replied with an empty smile. "Besides, I would very much like to meet your, ah, commanding officer."

Havoc and Fuery both gave hesitant nods of understanding before entering the elevator. Both of them opted not to say too much after noticing Arthur's tense demeanor after finding out their mission. This was definitely a bad sign. Could this Arthur Weasley have some connection to their Dumbledore? But more than that, would Mustang burn them to a crisp for blowing the mission already?! The two men shuddered at the thought.

Arthur was also having troubled thoughts. These Amestrians had seemed nice enough at first; he could almost see them as friends. (Maybe not those State Alchemists, but these guys seemed alright.) However, with the simple mention of Albus Dumbledore, that growing bound was quickly shattered. Arthur's mind was filled with suspicion and contempt. Why would these _foreigners_ want to investigate Dumbledore? Was the Minister behind all this? Or was this really some Amestrian spy mission... Arthur's thoughts were spinning out of control! This was not something he was used to dealing with.

_'But what choice do I have? I need to find out more about this mission of theirs. And warn Dumbledore about it immediately!'_ Arthur thought.

The two Amestrian soldiers led Arthur to Mustang's office at a quick pace; this issue could not be delayed. They only prayed that Mustang could use his expertise to patch things up.

Upon reaching the door, the three men could hear a female voice scolding on the other side.

"Sir! Please stop slacking off! Just because you're away from Central doesn't mean you can just lounge around like a moldy sack of potatoes!" Havoc pushed open the door to find Hawkeye with her hands on her hips, glaring death at a handsome General spinning in his chair.

"But I'm tired! And this work is so tedious..." Mustang whined.

"Sir, all you're doing is what you do everyday: paperwork!" Hawkeye raised an eyebrow.

"Exactly! It's so bor—" Hawkeye's right hand inched towards her gun and Mustang immediately put his hands in the air. "Alright, alright! I'd do the stupid paperwork!"

"Ah, sir? Havoc and Fuery are back...with a guest," Breda interrupted the office ritual.

With that comment, all three officers looked towards the open door to see their friends and a bemused wizard. Mustang immediately straightened from his slouch and sat to look the wizard in the eyes.

"What can I do for you sir?" Mustang said calmly, as if the stranger had not just seen him threatened by his subordinate to do his work.

"A-Ah yes. My name is Arthur Weasley, head of the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office, and I just thought I'd introduce myself to your department. I've always been curious about the muggle-magic of Amestris. The harmony between the two worlds that exists there has always fascinated me!"

Mustang nodded and replied diplomatically. "Well, it is a pleasure to meet you. I'm General Roy Mustang, the Flame Alchemist."

_'Flame Alchemist?! Is he one of those State Alchemists? He doesn't burn _people_, does he...?'_ Arthur fidgeted apprehensively.

Mustang noticed the small twitch, and smirked. "I can say for my whole team that we are equally fascinated by your country's magical abilities. We can find no alchemic equivalent to your astounding displays of power. Truly, your country would make a great ally." Mustang watched carefully as Arthur seemed to calm down.

"Well, I hope we can become good friends then. I'm actually pretty interested in this...D-Dumbledore mission of your as well." Arthur decided to take a chance and do some investigating.

_'Gotcha.'_ Mustang smirked even wider. "Oh? And why would that be of interest to you?"

"A-Ah...W-Well...um," Arthur stuttered.

"Then again, why wouldn't you be interested? From what I've gathered, this Dumbledore is quite the man, on all the recent newspapers too! Got to get a hand on those stories..." Mustang raised a hand to his chin.

"O-Oh, those stories aren't very accurate. I know the man pretty we–" Arthur caught himself. "Er...I know of him, so I could help you on your project."

"Hm. That's wonderful. I'll be sure to request your knowledge...and keep you posted on our progress." Mustang leaned back into his seat. "Now, I'm rather busy getting this office situated, so if you don't mind..."

Arthur nodded politely and said, "Of course. And I'd better get back to work as well. It was good making an acquaintance of you."

"Likewise," Mustang returned with a knowing glint in his eyes. Arthur didn't catch this, since he was hurriedly heading out the door.

As a result, Arthur left the Amestrians' office feeling quite accomplished. He had successfully weaseled himself into that Mustang's workplace, and would even get updates on their actions! He shouldn't get too excited though, this was a dangerous job. He had to find out what they were investigating and why. Were they trying to dig up dirt about Dumbledore? Or could the Ministry have found out about the Order? He couldn't waste any time; Dumbledore needs to know about this _now_!

Arthur quickened his pace as he rushed to the elevator. Luckily, the elevator doors slid open just as he neared it. In his hurry to enter the small elevator, he almost crashed into a grey haired man and a blonde haired boy dressed in blue Amestrian uniforms.

"Hey, watch it!" The boy exclaimed before sidestepping the wizard easily. "Clumsy old man..."

"S-Sorry, sorry." Arthur mumbled to the backs of the pair as they walked down the hallway. He watched curiously as the two entered Mustang's office.

_'What an odd pair. I would have thought it was a father leading a child, but that short guy was wearing a uniform too. He couldn't really be a kid...could he?'_ Arthur thought as the elevator doors closed.

* * *

"What the hell's with that smug expression, Bastard? Something good happen?"Ed asked as he entered the office with Falman.

"Why, yes it did, Fullmetal. I've just discovered a potential spy for Dumbledore." Mustang bragged, then furrowed his eyebrows. "What are you two doing back? Shouldn't you be monitoring the people at the archive division?"

"Yeah, we would've if there were any archive people. Apparently it's all done through magic, the lazy jackasses. All we got was this flimsy piece of shit. It's obviously been filtered already," Ed jerked his thumb towards Falman, who immediately handed Mustang the folded parchment. "So what's this about a spy?"

Mustang started skimming through the short notes. "Well, I figured Dumbledore would have followers in the Ministry, especially considering his fame. And since Havoc and Fuery leaked our mission to him," here Mustang turned to glare at the mentioned men, "he found his way over here. So now we have to mislead him, and Dumbledore whom we can assume he reports to, as to what we're doing. This may work in our advantage if we do it right, but I had hoped to keep this mission as secretive as possible."

"Sorry sir..." Havoc and Fuery lowered their heads in shame.

Mustang sighed. "Well, at least we have a link to him now. And I guess it's better to know who we're keeping secrets from."

Suddenly, Mustang's eyes stopped on a sentence in the middle of the parchment paper. Then, he glanced at Edward with a calculating look. "So it's safe to assume this is all we're getting from archives?"

"Well, yeah. It's not like we can go look at the records themselves or anything," Edward answered carefully. He recognized that look, Mustang was up to something.

"We do have this Arthur person to milk information out of, but that's going to be a biased and limited resource at best."

"...I'm assuming Arthur is the spy?" Edward knew he wasn't going to like Mustang's latest scheme, so he played along to Mustang's beating about the bush.

"Yes, but that's not important, at least not for you." Mustang paused, then asked, "Fullmetal, what do you say to an undercover mission?"

"...What? But I'm already on a mission!" Edward's surprise was evident on his face. That was the last thing he expected to come out of Mustang's mouth.

"Yes, I know, but I'm thinking of changing your mission to tentative undercover status." Mustang turned the parchment paper upside down and handed it over to Edward. "You see, it says here that Albus Dumbledore is currently the headmaster of a magic school called Hogwarts. You're the only one who can pass as a student. With your alchemy power and your..._appearance_, you're the most inconspicuous candidate. There are a few more details to consider, but we need to know more about him, and this is the only way. I need an unbiased view of who he is and what he's doing."

Edward's eyes narrowed. "...That '_appearance_' comment better not have been aimed at my height, Bastard, but I get your point. If this'll speed things along, I'll do it."

"Good. Very good. I'll get you set up right away. In the meantime, you can read up on wizard customs and school material so you're not too overwhelmed once you're there," Mustang then turned to his first lieutenant, "Hawkeye, please inform Fudge of Edward's new role and request some Hogwarts material. Make sure not to mention our run in with Arthur. We won't want to blow his cover just yet."

Hawkeye, who had stepped aside to silently observe since Arthur's arrival, nodded firmly and marched out the room.

* * *

A few hours later found Edward sitting on the couch of Mustang's new office, reading through the recent articles of _The Daily Prophet_. Hawkeye had come back from her talk with Fudge saying they would have to make a believable background for Edward as a transfer student before he could get him a spot in Hogwarts. Since there was nothing Ed could read until Mustang came up with a plausible story, Edward decided to do some research on Dumbledore through the wizarding world's version of the newspaper.

It would seem this was a good move, considering he now had a much better grasp of the current Dumbledore. Before, Edward just had a list of Dumbledore's major achievements. Now he had a few valuable leads to work with, like Dumbledore's involvement with some hallucinating Hogwarts student and a weird conspiracy theory regarding a nameless terrorist. ("'You-Know-Who'?! I don't fucking know who! That's why I'm reading this shitty paper!")

Edward looked up from the newspapers spread out on the coffee table. "Hey Mustang, I think I should register as a fifth year. In…" Edward flipped a few pages back. "Gryffindor? Whatever that means..."

Mustang raised an eyebrow. "Oh? Why's that?"

"Well, says here that Dumbledore's putting a lot of support behind some fifth year's delusions. Thought it might be interesting to do a quick shadowing of this Harry Potter brat."

"Harry Potter…Yes, he seems to be in the spotlight a lot. I'll get Hawkeye to inform the Minister after she comes back from her coffee break." Mustang leaned forward in his chair. "I've got an idea for your bio too. Of course, I don't know what kind of evidence the Ministry is capable of falsifying, so I'll give you a formal briefing about it later."

"Alright, whatever," Edward yawned loudly and sunk further into the couch seat typical teenage style. _'What an uneventful day…'_

* * *

Arthur walked out of the Ministry building at a brisk pace. He had known for a while that the Minister felt a level of contempt towards Dumbledore, but today's events really hit the notion home. Had Minister Fudge really become so paranoid that he had to hire foreigners to investigate the Hogwarts headmaster? Arthur could completely understand why the Order had to consider the Ministry of Magic as a potential enemy.

_I'm sure glad Albus had the thought to anticipate this and come up with an alternate form of contact, _Arthur thought as he searched through the contents of his wallet. "Where is that bloody card?!" He muttered to himself. "Ah ha! Here it is!"

Arthur looked up from where he was standing on a muggle street corner, and quickly scanned the area for a telephone booth. Upon spotting one down the street, he jogged towards it as his mind went over what to say. He had his arm already outstretched to pick up the receiver when he stepped into the booth. Arthur slid a few muggle coins into the slot before dialing.

"Ok, let's see...Dumbledore should be at Hogwarts right now, so the number is..." Arthur eyes shifted between the card in his left hand and the numbers on the contraption. "Zero... One, Four, One...Two, Seven, Three...Five, Zero, Two, Zero."

Arthur looked outside to the busy muggle streets of London as he listened to the dial tone, waiting for Dumbledore to pick up. Suddenly, he heard a click.

_"What's the matter, Arthur? I'm sure you know I have a very busy schedule the last few weeks before school starts,"_ Dumbledore's inquiring voice sounded through the telephone.

"Ah, Albus. I'm terribly sorry for interrupting your day, but I've got some information that really can't wait," Arthur replied.

_"…Go on."_

"A group of Amestrian soldiers moved into the Ministry today. They're here to _investigate_ you. I don't know their intentions yet, but I've managed to befriend them. The commanding officer has agreed to keep me updated on their activities."

Silence.

"Ah…Albus?"

_"…I have to say I wasn't expecting Amestrians to get involved in this mess. Thank you for letting me know."_ Arthur could hear a tired sigh coming from the other end. He pitied the poor man. The Hogwarts headmaster was already dealing with so much stress. Why did those Amestrians have to come in and make matters worse?!

_"Wait. Arthur! What do you mean they will be giving you updates? How do they even know you're involved in this?"_

"Oh, don't worry, Dumbledore. They don't suspect a thing. I originally made conversation because of my interest in their country, not their case. They told me about it later, so I just said I knew of you, you know, as a public figure. And was willing to help them on their case. Giving false information, of course."

_"Well, that's a relief. Still, be careful, Arthur. We don't know much about these Amestrians. Don't let your guard down, and don't put too much on the line for this,"_ Dumbledore cautioned.

"Don't worry! I've got this under control," Arthur reassured him. "I just wanted to let you know."

_"Thank you, Arthur. I wish you well."_ Dumbledore answered solemnly before hanging up.

* * *

**A/N:**

**I have to say, this is the most research I've done in a while! Haha. Credit goes to various HP fanatics, wikipedia, and a very helpful site: hp-lexicon . org. Thank you, internet! :)**

**I hope you guys liked the explanation Ed gave for the soundproof office. It was kinda out there but I thought it made sense… :P**

**Also, I decided to start looking for a beta for this story, so if anyone's interested, let me know :)**

**EDIT 06/30/13: Lady Ice214 and Scaehime-KingofKing's Daughter have mentioned to me that the last scene (Arthur speaks with Dumbledore on the muggle telephone) is slightly inaccurate. I did write a note to myself about researching into that, but for some reason I seemed to have forgotten! I have thought about changing the communication method, but realized that I prefer the telephone method for its direct conversation over any form of written message (or a patronus for that matter). Still, I would like to thank both these wonderful readers for being so attentive to the story! It really warms my heart. :)**

**Therefore, I will rationalize it with my own weird logic: We can assume that Arthur Weasley would know how to use a muggle telephone correctly since he's the Head of the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts Office. And Dumbledore is just so overfilling with knowledge that it would seem a stupid thing for him _not_ to know. Finally, since the the reason Arthur didn't contact Dumbledore until he was off work was so the Ministry can't listen in, perhaps the safest way to communicate (at least between these two) would be through muggle means. (And yes, I'm aware that Hogwarts' magic cancels out electrical devices, but I would assume Dumbledore's vast knowledge of spells and charms could counteract that little detail.) Also, the phone number is COMPLETELY fictional. I used the area code for Glasgow, Scotland (because that seemed fairly close to where Hogwarts should be), but besides that, the numbers following are completely random meaningless. Just putting it out there.**


	3. Readying the Nest

**A/N: I've decided to try a slightly different writing style for this chapter. For the last two chapters, I've felt that my writing was a bit two dimensional, focusing only on dialogue and surface emotions (if that makes sense). So, for starters, I tried to add more description to enhance the depth of the characters.**

**My writing is still in its developmental stages (as a former ESL student, I consider myself a bit of a late bloomer), so I would really appreciate any feedback you might have in regards to the story!**

**I would also like to thank Amarenima Redwood for beta-ing this chapter for me.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or Harry Potter.**

* * *

**Chapter Three: Readying the Nest**

Dolores Umbridge sat in her cushioned chair with her eyes closed and took in a deep meditative breath. She was preparing for war. Scheduled to leave for Hogwarts the following morning, she had one last chance to bask in the tranquility she found in this office. There was no doubt she would miss this feeling dearly.

This office, _her_ office, was proof of the authoritative status she held as Senior Undersecretary, second only to the Minister himself. Dolores was sad to part with such a distinguished position (though only temporarily), but she promised herself that she would reign over Hogwarts - or more precisely, _Dumbledore_ - before the first term was up.

_Knock. Knock._

The sudden interruption from her thoughts brought Dolores' eyes to focus on her door. "Who is it?" A sickly sweet voice floated out from her vocal cords.

"Dolores? It's me, Cornelius. May I have a word with you?" Minister Fudge's voice drifted in.

"Why of course, Minister. Please come in!" Umbridge replied. As the door swung open, she stood to greet her superior and continued. "How may I assist you, sir?"

"I have a favor to ask of you, Dolores. It is a grave issue and I am certain you will be inconvenienced, but I suspect it will further the purposes of the Ministry. As such, I must request that you comply with this laborious task." The Minister looked beaten down and his voice held a pleading tone.

Umbridge immediately picked up on his somber demeanor, and quickly stepped forward as if to support him. "Of course, Minister Fudge! No matter what your task, I will not be inconvenienced at all! I stand here to aid you and the Ministry in any way I can, sir!"

Cornelius Fudge let out a tremendous sigh and clasped his hands together behind his back. His eyebrows were furrowed and his eyes looked sunken and lifeless.

"Thank you, Dolores. I cannot image how much harder this position would be without your constant support. As you know, the Amestrians arrived earlier today and I put them on the task of investigating Dumbledore. They have just requested to have one of their own soldiers positioned at Hogwarts for further research." Fudge stated.

Umbridge's facial features twisted in disgust at the mention of the newly arrived foreigners. She hadn't bothered to introduce herself because she had hoped to stay as far away from them as possible. "So you want me to get the _muggle_ into Hogwarts?! I'm terribly sorry Minister, but a muggle cannot enter Hogwarts. In fact, I'm still astounded they were able to infiltrate even this far! Not to mention having a muggle as a staff member is completely absurd! I have full faith in your wisdom, Minister, but even you must agree this is an impossible request!"

"Please don't misunderstand, my dear Dolores. The man they are trying to send in is an alchemist, not exactly your average muggle-"

Umbridge was so filled with rage at the feeble excuse that she couldn't help but blurt out, "An _alchemist_? Ha! He may be slightly above a bumbling muggle, but _he is not a wizard!_"

"Calm down, Dolores! I know you are passionate about our muggle policies, but under these circumstances, this is the best we can do."

"_The best we can do?!_ There are a ton of better things we can do with muggles! If I had my way, they would have been eradicated ages ago!" Umbridge huffed.

"Please, Dolores, just hear me out! I just want you to meet with him before you leave tomorrow. He will be enrolling as an undercover student, so I would like you to keep in contact with him throughout the year. Steer him in our direction. I don't want the Amestrians to find out that we've been hiding the truth about You-Know-Who's revival." Fudge explained quickly so Umbridge could not interrupt him again.

However, it would seem Umbridge was too stunned by a certain piece of information to protest anymore.

"...S-Student? How is a grown man going to pose as a student?" Umbridge stared at Fudge, her raised eyebrows conveying surprise and confusion.

"Well, the man they are planning to send is apparently only eighteen years of age. And he could easily pass for younger..." Fudge explained, though he muttered the last statement mostly to himself.

"...Eighteen. Why, he's been of age for barely a year!" Umbridge blurted out in shock.

"Yes, Dolores, that has crossed my mind a couple of times. But please treat him with some respect. We do not want the Amestrian government on our backs for mistreating their _champion_ alchemist." Fudge said with a hint of jealousy. He knew he was too old to be jealous of a teenager, but was a little admiration too much to ask for?

"He's famous too...?" It would seem Umbridge was getting one surprise after another about this...child. _'I guess it'll be my job to knock him off his pedestal. I'm not afraid of some overdramatized muggle government!'_

"Yes. I've been told he has quite the reputation. But that aside," Fudge stared into Umbridge's eyes in an attempt to predict her reaction. "...Will you do it?"

_'I wonder how far I can push this spoiled muggle brat before he starts crying for his mommy...This might turn out to be fun,'_ the Senior Undersecretary thought cruelly.

"...Why of course, Minister."

* * *

Edward Elric sunk further into the russet leather couch that sat on the right end of the General's main office. The office design was actually comparable to Mustang's old one back in Central. This made Edward question if it was just an eerie coincidence or if the magicians had known about Mustang's workplace beforehand. If it were the latter, he could foresee some serious trust issues in the near future.

Still, it was nothing he could dwell on; this wasn't his area of expertise after all. Edward won't put it past Mustang to do some field investigation himself. If he hadn't known Mustang was such a high-ranking officer in the military, Ed would have sworn Mustang suffered from paranoia.

Edward was different though. He was more of a take-it-as-it-comes kinda guy (he refused to be labeled as impulsive!) and he had enough confidence in himself to know that he could work himself out of most landslide situations. These traits made him perfect material for fieldwork. Though he could come up with some first class strategies of his own, Edward thrived on the thrill of the hunt.

Unfortunately, this signature personality trait left him in his current sorry state: boredom. There was nothing to do in the office and he had been given specific orders not to wander around, seeing as Dumbledore spies could be lurking around every corner. He was stuck in a stage of unrest with nothing to do with his pent up energy. Everyone was still busy getting situated and he had run out of reading material an hour ago.

Edward gave a long suffering sigh before standing up for a cat-like stretch that popped three separate locations along his back. He looked around the disorganized office before spotting his fellow blond-headed friend. Edward gave a second long sigh then leisurely made his way across the room, deciding to break another one of those military rules that he never paid attention to.

"What are you up to over here, Havoc?" Ed peered over the man's shoulder curiously, trying to read the small print on the various papers in his friend's hand.

"I'm trying to find us a living space, sir." Havoc replied casually.

Havoc was no longer surprised by Edward's prodding. Edward always got like this when he was bored. He would get this look of half interest in his eyes as he lazily took in information that he didn't need nor want. Havoc didn't mind though. He could always use a distraction from work and he had a soft spot for the kid.

Edward had grown really close to the rest of the team in the last few years. Sure, everyone had always had some vague understanding for Edward's bizarre situation, but it wasn't until three years back that the team had really started _understanding_ the kid. Slowly uncovering Edward's character, every member of Mustang's inner circle found something to admire in the maturing adolescent. Before anyone could have noticed, Edward had become the genius little brother that no one had known they wanted.

"Oh, I hadn't really thought about that. I guess they wouldn't have dorms here, huh. I keep forgetting we're not in Amestris anymore. This whole Ministry setup is weird." Edward then scrunched up his nose in distaste. "And I've told you a million times to stop addressing me as 'sir.' Makes me feel old."

Havoc glanced up from his workplace and said in a teasing tone, "Old, huh? We bought you your first beer only a few months ago. I, on the other hand, can't even remember the first time I stepped into a bar. What are you saying about _my_ age, brat?"

"Hah. You probably can't remember because you got wasted the first time!" Edward said as he leaned into the desk. "Besides, you were probably bar hopping way before you were even legal."

"Hey, I waited my eighteen years. I'm not a trickster like you! You're the one that loves messing with people," Havoc shot back.

Edward flashed his signature smirk. "Can't deny that. Where else am I gonna get my fun? I would-"

"Fullmetal, are you distracting my men again? I swear nothing ever gets done when you're around," Mustang complained as he walked into the main office with an amused expression on his face.

"Are you sure it's not because you're constantly procrastinating? _I_ swear you've got that down to an art," Edward shot back, turning to face his commanding officer.

Mustang sighed. "Just get in my office. We have to figure out your background," he said, jabbing his thumb at the secondary office to his left. This office really was just like the one back home.

"Yes, yes, Mr. Boss-pants." Edward pushed himself off the edge of Havoc's desk and followed Mustang into his private office. "Let's just get this over with."

"Have a seat Fullmetal, we have a lot to talk about," General Mustang waved his gloved hand towards a leather couch as he walked around his oversized desk. "I did a bit of field research into how the school system here works. Turns out all potential magic students in the area are automatically notified by Hogwarts at the age of eleven." Mustang crossed his fingers together and furrowed his brows. "Which means, large magic schools such as Hogwarts don't really deal with transfer students."

"Well, can't I just be homeschooled or something? It can't be that uncommon," Edward shrugged as he plopped himself onto a couch perpendicular to Mustang's desk.

"Actually it is. And Dumbledore still would have gotten a notification of your situation seven years ago. So, I'm proposing that we be new immigrants from America, which has a much higher rate of private schooling and independent study," Mustang replied.

"Well, I don't know much about America since that country is even further away than this one, but I suppose it'd be better than pretending to know the culture around here," Edward suddenly tensed up and eyed Mustang suspiciously. "What do you mean by _we_? This is a solo mission, isn't it?"

"Well, you can't very well be an underage wizard living on your own. I will be posing as your guardian. This way, it won't be suspicious if we ever need to make contact. And since I'm always cleaning up your messes anyway, it won't be that far from the truth," Mustang shot a knowing smirk at Edward, who twitched in annoyance.

"Well, what do you expect when you're always sending me _into_ messes? Besides, I don't need a guardian; I can take care of myself!" Edward fumed. Mustang always liked to bring up his so-called 'messes,' but they were never his fault! (Okay, maybe _sometimes_, but still!)

"Well, in this case, you do, Fullmetal. It's nothing but a formality. I know you can take care of yourself just fine," Mustang explained. "The school requires parental consent for all students under the age of seventeen."

"...But I'm eighteen."

"No, you're going to be fifteen."

Edward shot out of his seat and an animalistic growl slid passed his gritting canines. "WHO'RE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE HAS TO WEAR STILETTOS AND A MUSTACHE TO PASS FOR A TODDLER?! Stop it with your stupid short jokes! They're not funny and I'M NOT SHORT!"

Mustang rested his cheek against the knuckles of his left hand and gave a long-suffering sigh. He'd admit to making it a personal mission to crack at least the one short joke per day. It was the only amusement in his dull office workplace after all. Besides, he was helping Edward build a tougher skin, wasn't he? ...Of course he was. Unfortunately, he actually _wasn't_ making a joke this time.

"First of all, _whatever_ you just said made absolutely zero sense. Secondly, _you_ were the one who suggested we investigate the Potter kid. How the hell are you supposed to do that if you're not even in the same year as him? He's fifteen. So you're going to be fifteen. It's not that hard to follow."

"What if they have some weird hocus pocus thing that'll rat me out?" Edward calmed down after being given a plausible explanation.

"By that logic, they would have figured out you're not a wizard long before they start worrying about your age. So there's nothing to worry about," Mustang shrugged.

"...So you're basically throwing me to the sharks."

"I thought you could take care of yourself? Besides, they're hardly sharks. More like... old people with pointy sticks." Mustang joked.

Edward stared at Mustang in exasperated horror. "Usually it's you telling me this, but has it occurred to you that you might be underestimating them?"

Mustang laughed heartily. "Edward, I don't underestimate anyone. I couldn't have climbed this high if I did. I'm just putting my faith in your ability to bullshit your way out of tough situations."

Edward huffed. "Gee, thanks. So are we done? You're my...guardian...and we're from America. That's it?" Edward stood up to leave.

"Of course we're not done! That's just the basic framework." Mustang leaned back into his cushioned seat, an indication that this conversation was far from over.

"That's... just perfect."

* * *

It was finally nearing the end of Fudge's agonizing Monday.

Being Minister was not an easy job after all. The weight of an entire race depended on his every decision, his every breath. Together with the power he wielded, there was also an intense fear that shackled him to the ground. Every move he made had to be meticulously analyzed for flaws. Just the crookedness of his frown could start the next uproar. His actions were constantly being questioned and scrutinized. He held the world in his palm, but in exchange, his face was mounted as the shield protecting this world. People were constantly taking swings at him left and right, and sometimes he had the suffocating urge to flee the country and take up a simple life deprived of responsibility and consequence.

However, Mondays were the worst. Every Monday felt like a painful kick in the butt, as if a higher being had dropped him from the sky and expected him to hit the ground running.

It didn't help that he couldn't even complete a thought without someone knocking on his door.

"Come in!" Fudge raised his voice so that it echoed briefly around his large office. He watched as a blonde lady clad in a blue uniform pushed open his door and stepped in promptly. "Ah, hello again, Miss...I'm terribly sorry, but it seems your name escapes me."

The woman gave a polite nod. "First Lieutenant Hawkeye, sir. I've come under General Mustang's request. He and Major Elric have compiled a file containing the details of their background for the undercover mission. The General would like you or a member of your staff to skim over the contents for any discrepancies and have the information registered as soon as possible." Fudge's eyes shifted towards a medium-sized file held by the lieutenant's extended hand.

"Yes, thank you. I will look over this myself and have it put into our archives by tomorrow morning." Fudge retrieved the file and placed on the upper left-hand corner of his desk. "Will that be all?"

"Yessir. I will take my leave now," Hawkeye gave a small bow in farewell and turned to leave the Minister's office.

Fudge suddenly recalled the talk he had with his second-in-command. "Oh, I almost forgot! I would like the boy, Major Elric, to meet with our Senior Undersecretary, Dolores Umbridge in her office at 9:30 tomorrow morning. She will be at Hogwarts this year for work, so it would be good for them to introduce themselves beforehand. Her office is on the first floor," the Minister called to the retreating back of the blonde woman.

Hawkeye looked back and gave a sharp nod. "I will inform Major Elric immediately, sir."

She closed the door softly behind her and quickly made her way to the elevator. Her shift was almost over, but there was still a lot to be done before she could call it a day. Her next step would be to check up on Havoc and see if he had made any progress on their living arrangements yet. One of the unspoken hardships of military transfers was finding lodging for all the displaced soldiers. Soldiers had no need for luxury; they had been trained to survive the harshest of conditions. Nonetheless, there were still standards to be had, especially considering the team's indefinite length of stay. For all they knew, they could be situated here anywhere between weeks to years.

The female soldier grimaced at the thought of being forced to live in a foreign country for years. _'I suppose I should be grateful that at least my makeshift family is with me. But still, I love the country I serve. Parting with it for any amount of time is saddening.'_

Hawkeye pulled herself out of her thoughts as she pushed open the doors to the new Amestrian office. Her chestnut colored eyes scanned the outer office for a dirty blond nicotine addict. Upon spotting Havoc's messy hair behind a stack of brochures and paperwork, she made her way towards him.

"Lieutenant Havoc. How's your search coming along?" Hawkeye sidestepped around the desk to peer at whatever it was the male was writing. It turned out to be an elaborate chart displaying the features of each housing establishment in the area.

"Oh, hey there, Hawkeye. Done with the Minister already, huh?" Seeing her quick nod in confirmation, Havoc quickly continued. "Well, based on the budget our Fuhrer has allowed us for this mission, we can spend up to 250,000 cenz on rent all together. Converting to the muggle currency here, that'll be around 1600 pounds. So! We have two options."

Havoc leaned over his desk to dig through the pile of brochures he had stacked haphazardly in a corner. He pulled out two wrinkled pamphlets, one bordered by green and blue stripes while the other was cheaply printed on faded yellow paper. He handed the striped brochure to Hawkeye first

"This one is a fairly nice place. Definitely nicer than my apartment back home. Two beds, a bath, and a kitchen. We can only afford two rooms, so two people will have to sleep on the floor. That's after Ed's left for Hogwarts," Seeing Hawkeye's growing frown, Havoc made a face in agreement and handed over the second brochure.

"And then there's this one. It's a bit sketchy, but offers a similar floor plan. Unfurnished and about a half-hour walk from here. Good news is we can afford three rooms so at least everyone will have a bed to sleep on. Everything else is way out of our budget. London's a pretty expensive place to live in, apparently."

Havoc waited patiently for Hawkeye to digest the information he had just spent the last four hours digging up. The choice seemed obvious though, so it was no surprise to him when Hawkeye looked up from the brochure and said, "This one it is then. Please contact them immediately. Let's see if we can get this place within a week. I'll go book a few hotel rooms for the night. We can figure out the rest later."

Havoc pushed out his chest proudly and cleared his throat to get the attention of a retreating Hawkeye. "_Actually_, I took the liberty of booking us four rooms at the London Hostel already. Since I was in charge of our lodging, I thought I might as well." Havoc was usually seen as the most laid back of Mustang's crew, but no one ever questioned his capacities as a top-notch soldier. Despite his weak spot for women (or more precisely womanly parts), he was otherwise a very levelheaded and observant individual.

Hawkeye knew this and decided to show her appreciation with two firm pats to Havoc's shoulder. "Thanks for that. Finish this last bit up and go take your break. You've been running around all day."

Havoc chuckled at that. "And don't I know it. Thanks, Hawkeye. I'll probably go entertain Ed after I'm done here. Looks like he's so bored he'll start tearing his hair out of his head soon."

Hawkeye turned to look at the golden-eyed teenager sitting on the couch, transmuting his right arm into various oriental weapons, many of which the sniper could not even identify. A thought popped into her mind as she continued to stare at the team's youngest member.

She excused herself and went to stand in front of the Fullmetal Alchemist. Hawkeye cleared her throat to indicate her presence.

Edward's head snapped to attention, his eyes sparkling in anticipation. Anything to distract him from _nothing_ was a blessing.

"What's up, Lieutenant? Did you want me for something?" Edward questioned eagerly.

Hawkeye gave a light giggle and smiled down at the teenager. "Are you really that bored, Edward? I can't remember the last time someone actually _asked_ to do something in the office."

Edward let out a defeated sigh. "Since my mission status changed, Mustang hasn't let me do anything to help. According to protocol, my new status apparently doesn't allow for any office work. He said it'll mess up the 'integrity of the team's report' if I start doing other people's jobs," Edward complained, doing air quotes mockingly with his fingers as he imitated Mustang's speech. "There's nothing for me to do! I can't take this for a whole week, and it's not like I can keep reading the same newspapers all day. I can already recite the whole damn thing _backwards_!"

"Well then, I'm sure you'll be glad to know that your mission officially starts tomorrow." Although amused, Hawkeye decided to spare herself the rant. At Edward's inquiring gaze, she continued, "The Minister has scheduled an appointment for you tomorrow morning at 9:30 sharp. He wants you to introduce yourself to a Dolores Umbridge on the first floor. She's the Senior Undersecretary for the Ministry and she's being transferred to Hogwarts this year for some sort of Ministry business. It would probably be a good idea to get a grasp of her character tomorrow. She could become either an ally or a hindrance."

Edward gave a contemplating nod in reply. He understood that Hawkeye was drawing from her years of military experience and picked up on her hidden advice. Just because they were currently aiding the Ministry didn't mean that they could be trusted. This Umbridge character was a stranger and he would have to treat her as such. Not to mention, there was an obvious cultural, maybe even racial, gap between the Amestrians and the British.

Edward was acutely aware of his lack of knowledge in the field of magic. At the same time, he was equally aware of how little the magicians seemed to know about the Amestrian culture. And if there was one thing he had learned from his run-ins with both the Ishvalans and the Homunculi, it was that ignorance bred fear, and fear bred hate. Moreover, Edward had discovered that no one was immune to the vicious cycle, not even himself. There were times he distinctly remembered hating Scar, and Greed, and Wrath, and Lust just as much as they had hated him. It was only through hearing their stories and empathizing with their sorrows that he was able to look beyond his own prejudices. Edward valued this lesson dearly and had become much more observant of both his own and other's perceptions since then.

"I gotcha. No worries, Lieutenant. I'll make sure to read through all her defenses," Edward flashed a reassuring grin and Hawkeye did seem reassured, her shoulders losing some of their tension and her lips curving into a gentle smile.

"On a separate note, we'll be heading to our hotel in a few minutes, so you will be free from your boredom soon. I'm going to relieve the General of his work, and then we can all head out." Hawkeye said.

"Did you hear that, guys? We're done for the day!" Breda jumped up from his desk chair in triumph and cheered loudly. It had been a tiring day and he couldn't wait to crawl into a warm comfy bed.

"What, really? Finally!" Fuery exclaimed as he leaned back into his seat, breathing out a sigh of relief. He watched as Hawkeye entered Mustang's private office and shifted his gaze to Falman, who was still filling out forms to his left. "Come on man, just leave those till tomorrow. We've done enough for one day!"

Soon everyone had grabbed their coats and luggage bags and was rushing out of their office in anticipation of a good night's sleep.

Day one: complete.

* * *

**A/N: There you go, Chapter 3! I feel like this is mostly a transition chapter, but some key elements have been set in place, so I felt this was a necessary step.**

**I do think Umbridge was a bit out of character, disrespecting Fudge and ranting away. But I can still see it happening. Umbridge seems like a total control freak to me, and it's like she's always just barely holding in a tantrum. Given how much she despises every creature except her own kind, I can totally imagine her head exploding at this whole alchemist-meet-magic situation haha.**

**I actually had to look into London housing for this chapter. Some of the apartments can be pretty expensive, but man! What a nice way to live. I'm so jealous... All I get is a boring little town "near San Francisco" (except it totally isn't). =.= So, thank you, rightmove . co . uk for making me wish I lived in London. (Just another bucket list item that won't make it into the bucket. Woe is me.)**

**Now that I'm done my ramblings, it's time for you all to hit that review button! Thanks for reading!**


	4. Cat and Mouse

**A/N: First, I would like to thank all my wonderful reviewers! You guys really are my motivation to keep this thing going :) And I have to say, I've got some pretty smart reviewers, too. I've got one or two who have guessed pretty close to what I have in mind for this story. Kudos to you! And I've also got really nice suggestions and critiques from you guys too! I really appreciate the feedback. Thank you guys so much!**

**Next, I would like to apologize for the delayed update. I recently moved up to Seattle for school and it's taken us (me and my housemates) a while to get everything situated. That includes utilities like heating, INTERNET (sad face), and we just found out there might be a problem with our water supply. Yuck. Anyways, with college problems and working/volunteering for +20 hrs/week I'm expecting some delay for the next chapter as well. Sorry guys! Life is getting in the way. :(**

**On a happier note, I would like to thank my beta again for her wonderful job this chapter. Thank you, Amarenima Redwood!**

**Onwards~**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Fullmetal Alchemist or Harry Potter.**

* * *

**Chapter 4: Cat and Mouse**

The atmosphere in the office was tense. Two people of contrasting origins sat rigidly across from one another, one suited in a royal blue military uniform while the other was wrapped in a cerise coatdress. Their eyes jumped sporadically from sleeve cuffs to shoulder pads in search of some feeble hint to the other's personality. When it became clear that a physical evaluation could do no further good, the two pairs of eyes met each other in a silent duel for dominance. A victor was decided when shimmering golden irises suddenly lost their intensity and were momentarily covered by two consecutive blinks.

Umbridge's thin lips curled into the smirk of a trained predator as she stared down at the boy in front of her. She cleared her throat and spoke.

"So you are Major Elric? I'm actually quite surprised. You don't look nearly as gruesome and unkempt as I expected of a muggle like yourself."

Edward's eyes flashed in masked defiance but his face remained motionless._ 'Meaning I'm still gruesome and unkempt even though I don't look it, right?'_

Edward purposely widened his eyes in falsified confusion and tilted his head mechanically to the side. "What's a muggle? Sorry, but I'm not familiar with that term." Truthfully, the word had come up several times in Minister Fudge's briefing folder, and Edward could make a pretty confident conjecture from the numerous contextual clues. Still, it would be best to feint naiveté, especially with the plan he just hatched.

"Oh, haha. Of course you aren't. I had nearly forgotten how ignorant and utterly stupid you are. _Muggles_ are people like you, lesser people not capable of magic," Umbridge waved her hand carelessly in his direction, as if the gesture itself could sweep him under her rug and out of her sight. Normally the Ministry official was able to keep her personal ideals locked away in order to maintain her professional image, but this incidence grated against every fiber of her being._ 'There's nothing he can do to me anyway. I outrank him, and more importantly, I have magic on my side. Soon, he will be nothing more than my useless little puppet on a string.'_

Edward could only hear the verbal side of Umbridge's prejudice, but he didn't doubt for a second that she was thinking nastier thoughts. Still, he took offense to the jab at his intelligence. Reluctantly, Edward decided to let it slide and steer in a different direction. He had a job to do right now (and he could always deal with her insults later). "Being a muggle doesn't make me stupid. I just make a living using different resources."

Umbridge laughed. "I almost hope you are joking."

Edward narrowed his eyes in careful anticipation. "What's so funny?"

"You have just confirmed my point. You see, you don't _have_ any resources. You're a muggle! Not to mention a teenager. I hardly doubt you have experience doing much of anything, especially real adults' work," Umbridge sneered. She couldn't help but bring up his age. For some reason, the striking youth of the soldier irritated her to no end. There was just no plausible way for him to have even entered the famed Amestrian military at such a young age. Even if that military was just a lineup of sniffling muggles. There was no doubt in the witch's mind that this boy had bribed his way up the military ladder with his parent's money. '_Powerless and_ _therefore_ useless. _Ill-mannered and disgustingly overconfident. He's a complete waste of my time.'_

"I'm sorry, but do you hold something against me? I hardly know you, and you're insulting me left and right! Look, I don't have to prove my credentials to you, and I don't have to take this harassment! Obviously, you don't like me much, but I don't really like you either. So how about we just swap profiles and promise to stay out of each other's hair, hmm?" Edward decided to fold his arms for good measure and cement his persona as a spoiled adolescent.

After yesterday's talk with Hawkeye about being an observant interrogator, Edward had spent the night contemplating the best approach given his lack of background knowledge. He was basically walking into this meeting blind. Edward had momentarily considered frightening this Umbridge character into submission with his alchemy. It would have been quite amusing on his part, but his chances of gaining actual information were slim to none. Without knowing the mystery woman's personality and motive, it was near impossible to formulate an effective plan of action.

So in typical Fullmetal fashion, he decided to sleep on it and completely disregard the problem until he was face to face with the woman. As luck would have it, Edward was hit with a stroke of genius as he was staring down the witch. She seemed like the pompous, insufferable type, so Edward decided to nurse her oversized ego and see what beans she would metaphorically spill. Unfortunately, stroking her ego in this case would mean downplaying his capabilities and encouraging the assumptions she made about him. Her own twisted narcissistic mind would take care of the rest.

As Edward had hoped, Umbridge's cruel smirk widened. "Quite demanding, aren't you? I knew I was right about you: leaching off your family's fortune while hypocritically proclaiming your independence. You've only proven your inexperience."

Umbridge's smirk turned smug as she continued, "Unfortunately for you, this is no children's game. Hogwarts is a volatile environment with a self-righteous headmaster. I am more than capable of handling the situation myself. I will have influence there as their esteemed Defense Against the Dark Arts professor. I don't see how you can contribute to the Ministry by pretending to be a student. Just don't come bothering me when those filthy creatures of the Forbidden Forest decide to eat you for dinner."

_'I think she's told me more than enough for now. I'll just test her intellect before I wrap this up. The sooner I'm out of here, the better,'_ Edward suddenly dropped his rigid exterior, his back falling into a natural slouch while an automail ankle rose up and casually landed on his flesh knee. His left hand casually caught his metal calf to secure the position in place. Edward's sudden change in conduct caused Umbridge's brows to furrow in bewildered offense, and he couldn't help but shoot a satisfied smirk back at her. "I suggest you don't forget that I'm still a State Alchemist. I can hold my own."

"W-What do you think you are doing?! I am the Senior Undersecretary of the Ministry and I expect you to conduct yourself properly in my presence! Don't you dare carry yourself in such a pretentious manner simply because you can do a little alchemy," Umbridge snarled at Edward, her facing heating up to a raging red.

Finding Umbridge's annoyance quite amusing, Edward deliberately leaned back in his seat to further infuriate her. In straight defiance, Edward replied, "Sounds like you don't know shit about alchemy, if you can just write it off as _little_," Edward emphasized the last word with a certain harshness, his own anger rising at how Umbridge _must_ have thought of alchemy as little because she thought _he_ was little – which he was not!_ 'Stupid old bitch! I'll crush her dead!'_

Umbridge unwittingly avoided a catastrophe by focusing on the former rather than the latter part of Edward's statement. "I would highly suggest washing out your filthy barbarian mouth with soap! And there is nothing to know about alchemy! It's a dead end failure for greedy worms desperate for power and longevity!"

"What are you, fucking mental?! Alchemy is a vibrant, _flourishing_ art form that teaches the principles that govern the universe! It's a strict science that requires years of discipline and wisdom. The timeless philosophies that alchemy was founded upon can be applied long after death, yet the simplest alchemical transmutations can fill a child's eyes with wonder! If there was any true miracle on this earth, it would be alchemy!" Edward had leapt off his seat in his passionate and aggressive rebuttal.

Edward could not tolerate any insult to his life's addiction. He had a love for alchemy that could only be rivaled by his love for his brother. Even when his body had been torn apart by the Gate of Truth, even when this entity that was the core of alchemy had stolen away his precious baby brother, Edward could never blame the science. Could never shun it. Alchemy was woven into his very being, and he could never part with it even if he tried.

"Oh?" Umbridge raised her eyebrows mockingly, happy to have finally gotten a reaction out of the alchemist. "You seem to think I'm misinformed. Well then, why don't you enlighten me? What can you do with your muggle magic?"

Edward immediately went on high alert. Umbridge was undoubtedly trying to extract information from him, but he was no amateur. From the moment he walked in, Edward had expected something like this. Umbridge wasn't second-in-command in the Ministry of Magic because of her looks, after all. He would not let the woman get the upper hand, nor would he sacrifice his hard work just to blow off some steam.

"Well, put simply, alchemy...creates things. Alchemists have the ability to manipulate the materials around them and shape them into whatever they please. Within certain limitations, of course. Alchemy is based in science, so obviously universal laws have to be followed. For example, I could make a bridge from the soil beneath my feet but not the air I breathe. I once made this elaborate sculpture of a raging horse from the minerals in a friend's backyard. It was quite detailed. You could even see the individual strands that formed the horse's reins. One of my best works," Edward flashed a proud smile while thinking,_ 'Let's see what she can extrapolate from that little description.'_

"Bridges and statues. Is that supposed to impress me? So you can pile a few mounds of dirt on top of each other. How's that going to help you when a herd of acromantulas has you trapped in their web? They'll rip you to shreds and your_ art form_ won't be of use at all."

_'Seems like she's got a few malfunctioned synapses. Obviously if I can make something with the durability of a bridge and the detail of a sculpture, it would be child's play for me to make an arsenal of weapons and a field of barricades.'_ Instead of correcting Umbridge's close-minded thinking, Edward chose to focus on a different issue. "Herds are for cows. I believe the word you're looking for is colony."

"W-Wha–? You–!" Umbridge's mouth dropped open in astonishment. Her attempts to strike fear into the soldier's mind were effortlessly sidestepped. The Amestrian didn't even look fazed by the idea of dismemberment.

Edward tilted his head upwards and gave the woman fumbling for words across from him a condescending look. "Isn't English _your_ language?" He thumped his right fist into the open palm of his left hand as if he had just experienced a 'Eureka!' moment. "Oh, I see! This is why you're being sent back to school."

"You _insufferable_–! How _dare _you mock me in my own office!" Umbridge slammed her meaty hands against the surface of her desk, her chair sliding back from the impact her legs made against it as she stood.

"Oh, so sorry. I'll make sure to mock you outside your office next time!" Edward absolutely hated staying seated when the person shouting at him was standing. It made him feel that much..._shorter_.

"You arrogant, immature–"

"I don't want to get into an _immature_ name-calling match with you, so I'll just take my leave," Edward interrupted. "But before I go, I just want to check that I've got all the facts straight."

Edward suddenly jumped up from his relaxed seated position and placed his gloved hands on Umbridge's desk. He leaned in until his face was less than a foot away from that of the Senior Undersecretary's. "_You_ are an indiscriminate muggle hater whose prejudice extends to every race except your own. You are going to Hogwarts as an authoritative figure. But you're not getting sacked so your real job is actually to spread the Ministry's propaganda to young impressionable children. And from what I've learned in my _years_ with the military, where there's propaganda, there's skeletons. Not to mention, you obviously don't want the military –especially me– involved, so you've got a hidden agenda that we aren't supposed to know about. Oh, and your boss, Fudgecakes? He's sending you in after Dumbledore when he's already sent us in. It's never a good sign when you've got more than one team tracking the same target. Maybe he's the one with the hidden agenda? Wanna fill me in now? Or later? We've got a whole year ahead of us, _Professor_."

Umbridge's face was contorted into an expression of horror. She took two staggering steps back and unceremoniously dropped down into her chair. She had been shocked into speechlessness, and for the first time in a long time, she felt like a cornered rat.

Edward pushed himself off the woman's desk with a satisfied smirk. After happily accessing the damage he had done to his prey, Edward spun on his heels and headed towards the door. Just as he was about to turn the corner and disappear from sight, he suddenly stopped himself. As if he had forgotten something, Edward turned back around to face Umbridge, his body casually leaning against the smooth door frame.

"Just so you know, as of right now, you are a lot more ignorant than me." The young alchemist waved a cheerful goodbye and disappeared from Umbridge's view.

It was only a few minutes later that Umbridge came to realize that in her desperate attempts to intimidate the Amestrian, she had not learned anything about Edward Elric.

* * *

Roy Mustang pushed open the bathroom door and reentered the main hallway. He took a step towards his office but suddenly stopped in realization._ 'All that's waiting for me back there is more paperwork,'_ he thought.

Swiftly turning around, Mustang headed straight for the elevator on the opposite end of the hall._ 'I'll just tell Hawkeye I got lost along the way.'_

Mustang leisurely stepped into the welcoming elevator and watched in triumph as the decorated metal doors closed, obscuring his view of the workplace (and Hawkeye's view of his impromptu getaway).

The General contemplated briefly on which floor to get off at before deciding to just follow one of the people standing around him._ 'Hmm. That's quite the interesting color for a trench coat. I'll follow him then,'_ he thought as he scanned the small space.

A few floors later and Mustang could be seen casually strolling the hallways of the Law Enforcement Department. It was actually quite a boring setting and he had half a mind to turn back and pick a different floor. This notion was quickly snuffed out when a beautiful redhead hurried past him.

_'She's got quite the figure. Nice rack too,'_ Mustang smirked and hurried after her. "Excuse me, miss?

The young woman looked up from the file she had been skimming and began to turn towards him. Looking peeved, she chided, "Look you, I don't have time for–..._wow_."

The woman's demeanor changed from annoyance to shock, and settled on appreciative wonder. Her nine-to-five work schedule was very taxing on her social life, and she constantly pulled extra hours in order to prove herself to her more seasoned co-workers. As a result, most of the males she interacted with were fifty-something year old men unhappily married to nagging wives. But here was this exotic male specimen, standing within her reach in all his glory. Needless to say, she was flabbergasted.

Mustang's smirk widened when it became obvious that the woman was already mentally undressing him. It seemed that no matter what country he was in, women would still react to him the same.

"I-I mean...hi," she said as she let out a breathy exhale.

"Hello, my name is Roy Mustang. I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"Oh no, not at all! I was just skimming over this template for our latest Educational Decree. It's a...thing," the woman waved her file in the air. Abruptly, she extended her right hand and said, "I'm Rosanna Leagurn, by the way! B-But you can call me Rosie."

"Well then, Rosie, it's a pleasure to meet you," Mustang flashed his pearly white teeth and shook her hand with a comfortable firmness.

"The p-pleasure's all mine," A deep red blush reached all the way to Rosie's ears and she shyly looked towards her feet. "S-So, what can I help you with, Mr. Mustang?"

Mustang's chuckling nearly caused Rosanna's heart to skip a beat. "Please, Roy is fine. You see, I transferred here with my team from Amestris yesterday. Unfortunately, I'm not very knowledgeable of the legal side of the Ministry. If you're not too busy, I was hoping you could fill me in?"

"Oh wow! All the way from Amestris? That's so…_exotic_," Rosanna replied. "I'm pretty sure I can take an early lunch break. This thing isn't due until later today anyway." Rosie gave a girlish giggle as she offhandedly waved the file in her hand.

"Why don't we go to the break room? It would be much more comfortable than standing in the middle of the hallway," Rosie bravely hooked Mustang's elbow with hers and started leading him down the hall.

"That sounds wonderful," Mustang said as he eyed the file in Rosie's hand. _'I wonder if that file pertains to my case at all. She did say it was an Educational Decree, which will no doubt affect the target at least minutely. I suppose I could get some work done while I'm here. Maybe Hawkeye won't kill me if I bring back something useful.'_

"So tell me about yourself, Rosie. What do you do around here?" It was time for Mustang's favorite sport: fishing.

"Um, I usually work in the Improper Use of Magic office, but the Senior Undersecretary suddenly requested that this decree be put in action by tomorrow. The Educational Laws Branch was short on people, so I was temporarily transferred to help out."

"I hope this decree doesn't affect the students too much. I have a niece who's starting her first year at that famous Hogwarts School next week. She's already nervous enough as it is, you know?" Mustang eyed Rosie from the corner of his eye, anticipating a reaction to the school name.

"Oh, no need to worry! This decree is focused more on the staff, and Hogwarts is a wonderfully friendly environment. I would know, I graduated from Hogwarts just two years ago!" Rosie replied.

Of course, Mustang already assumed that Rosie would be a Hogwarts alumnus. Hogwarts was the only magic school in the country, after all. What he was pleasantly surprised by was how little time had passed since Rosie had last been in that environment. Mustang didn't doubt that her experiences would be very similar to what Edward would eventually have to go up against.

As a result, the cogs in Mustang's brain started turning at full speed, churning out one inquiry after another. "You don't say..."

* * *

Several hours later saw Mustang stalking down the halls of the fifth level with a mildly disgruntled auror tailing behind him.

"Where the hell is that Mustang anyway? The bastard shouldn't need a_ two hour_ bathroom break," a muffled chuckle made its way through Mustang's large wooden doors. "Maybe he's got himself locked in a stall. Or maybe he's found some secretary girl–"

The General hastily pushed open the doors and cleared his throat pointedly. "Don't lecture me about taking it easy when you're the one lounging on the couch, Fullmetal. And unlike you, I actually was working, just out of office."

Edward huffed in irritation. "I was doing work. I finished my intermediate report half an hour ago." The alchemist glanced discreetly behind Mustang at the unknown man standing just outside the door. "It's in EC05."

Mustang's eyes widened at the decided use of an Encrypted Code series. Those were usually only used for sensitive information. Not to mention, the fifth variation was moderately hard to crack, and relatively tedious to write out. Deciding not to give away his level of surprise to the wizard standing behind him, Mustang answered nonchalantly, "Hm. Guess I'll read that later. Most importantly, I would like to introduce you to this man."

The mysterious man who had stayed at a distance stepped into the office at Mustang's prompt. He was dressed smartly and with his piercing grey eyes and rigid face, he advanced purposefully towards Edward.

"John Dawlish...sir. I am a senior auror for the Ministry. I will be escorting you to Daigon Ally today to get your school supplies for your mission."

Edward stood up from his comfortable position on the couch and offered his automail right hand for a shake. "Major Edward Elric, Fullmetal Alchemist."

After what he assumed was a firm shake, Edward turned to Mustang and raised an eyebrow in question. "Care to explain?"

"After I left the office, I decided to do some field research. I was questioning an employee in the Law Enforcement Department and she mentioned that she graduated from Hogwarts recently. Her younger sister is entering the fifth year with you so I asked for a list of books and such so you can get caught up for schooling. Here," Mustang pulled out a folded piece of parchment from his left pocket and handed it to Edward.

"You've got a lot of studying ahead of you this week, Fullmetal. You should probably get going now. Right, Mr. Dawlish?"

"Yes, sir. We have a lot of ground to cover. It would be best if we head out now," the auror replied.

Edward skimmed through the list, his expression visibly changing at various things on the list. Once he was done, Edward turned to address Dawlish directly. "I'll just grab my coat and we can get going. That alright with you?"

"Yes, sir."

* * *

**A/N: I am no expert at picking up girls (especially from a guy's point of view), but I hope that little Rosie scene was still believable. I was so tempted to have Mustang pull a classic Tribbiani "How you doin'?" in this chapter (obviously watching too much Friends lately xD). Unfortunately, that would've been way weird so I had to restrain myself.**

**On the subject of names, the name Rosanna may not be used as often now, but in the 1970's it was an increasingly popular name. And since this story is set in 1995 (this chapter being on Tuesday, August 29th haha I did my homework) I thought it would be appropriate.**

**Please give a quick review before you go off to explore the rest of this wondrous fandom! :)**


End file.
